I’m a paramedic.
Doctors give us training on pain. They say it’s subjective and there is no way to measure it accurately. Sometimes there is a physiological (your bodies) response to it. Your pulse may quicken and your blood pressure might raise up. This isn’t always the case though. You may not have any real physical response to it at all.
Pain is ultimately personal.
And, pain is something we often don’t share with others. As a paramedic, I’ve found that the more a person is hurt, the less sound they make. They become internal, quiet and focused on trying to stay alive through the suffering.
I don’t think emotional pain is much different. It’s something we internalize and often suffer through quietly. But, instead of the external thing being a broken bone, it’s a broken heart.
There’s no way to breathe through the pain of a broken heart.
Breathing probably feels like it makes it worse. And, when you hurt emotionally, you can’t really see the end game. At least with an injury, there’s the physical aspect of getting better.
Survival sounds good when your body is hurt, but it sounds like more of the same when your heart is what’s hurting.
That’s the thing about writing. It’s breathing through the pain in a different way.
Your heart can’t take a breath and reset and focus on ice cream. Your heart won’t let you shut the door of exploding emotions when those very emotions are what makes you who you are. You have to get them out, and you have to process them.
About your hurt, sorrow, personal pain and terror.
Write about why it hurts and why it shouldn’t.
Do it to let go and hold on at the same time.
Write because you can.
Write to breathe and keep breathing.